# Similar Movies Like The Cottage
The Cottage 2008
About: In a remote part of the countryside, a bungled kidnapping turns into a living nightmare for four central characters when they cross paths with a psychopathic farmer and all hell breaks loose.
Released: 14 Mar 2008 Director: Paul Andrew Williams Writers: Paul Andrew Williams Actors: Andy Serkis, Reece Shearsmith, Jennifer Ellison, Steven O'Donnell Genres: Comedy, Crime, Horror, Thriller
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The Cottage Reviews:

Director Paul Andrew Williams wanted to "write a movie that cost no cash and was all set in one place". And the first sixty or so mins stuck to this agenda cute well; Two brothers kidnap the daughter (Jennifer Ellison) of a wealthy man, he sends out two crazy Chinese guys to slay them, nerdy brother Peter (Reece Shearsmith) looses the all necessary android smartphone and older hard-man brother David (Andy Serkis) swears a lot, all in the confines of a deserted cottage. The dialogue is just about snappy enough to hold this interesting. Not much to be told for the camera work – but it does kinda add to the atmosphere. And then they end up in other cottage and the blood bath begins.It's cute obvious why they cast Ellison: she has large bouncy boobs and her harsh liverpoodlian accent is juxtaposed perfectly with her blonde hair and Barbie doll face. No one really cares that her script rarely ventures beyond words too rude to publish here – the camera generally focuses on her chest/backside with the occasional headbut thrown in. Shame really; I was hoping she'd amaze us all with her diverse acting talent, but I guess it's a situation of you can take the woman out of Brookside but you won't receive an nice actress out of a soap star.Serkis in undeniably the star of this film. The excellent gangster with a heart, his sincerity and charm kept me watching throughout. I'm not entirely sure why he chose to do The Cottage – perhaps, like me, he was hoping this would be one of those rare things; a funny independent British comedy. But unfortunately it just felt like Williams had taken The Chain Sore Massacre and Hot Fuzz, slash out the greatest bits, stuck the leftovers in a blender and then forgot to cook it properly.By all means go see this if you like blood, guts and rolling heads, just don't expect any intellect in the script.


British horror films have everytime had a special sense of humour, with "Severance" being a nice newest example of savvy brit film-makers throwing laughs and gore together to nice effect. This carries on that tradition, and in Reece Shearsmith they're blessed with an actor whose comic chops are well up to scratch. Andy Serkis is no slouch either, testing the straight boy brilliantly as a mobster who's difficult as nails but a tiny fuzzy on the inside.The laughs are cute reliable, and as the case goes from terrible to worse a lot of those laughs come from the (severe) misfortune of the terrible souls on screen, and the blend of splatter and slapstick is well tuned. Jennifer Ellison does grate after a while, her constant test of swearing amusing at times but often a tiny irritating. Still, she has a wonderful body on her and that ball shrivellingly tough accent to fall back on, so her presence isn't entirely unwelcome. As a comedy it works extremely well, and as a gore film there's some inventively wince-inducing moments, and with the balance just right "The Cottage" is well worth a visit.


The greatest method to sum up this movie is 'interesting...!' The violence, blood and gore is fantastic. If you wish to see folks decapitated and hacked to bits and wish to laugh at the same time, this newest British horror comedy is definitely for you. The main characters are fun, likable and witty, Andy Serkis is fantastic, the dialogue is hilarious and the movie is just entertaining from begin to finish.However, the story is quite simply all over the place. It's an incoherent mess to be exact! The movie just twists and turns in various directions raising a number of questions, which it then leaves unanswered. Characters and subplots are introduced and then forgotten about. However, I'm guessing most folks would not wish to see this for the plot so if you just wish some mindless, gory fun, go and see this.



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