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Oh, Skullduggery, you horrible tiny cow patty of a film. Your actors are stiff and couldn't read the dialogue for an Ovaltine commercial with a sense of conviction, your plot is incomprehensible and filled to the brim with pompous symbolism no one buts its filmmakers should explain, and in the end, you just plain stink. But gosh darn it if I don't feel proud to have you in my collection of films. You are, without a doubt, the crown jewel in my cornucopia of crap. I threaten my mates with you and they cringe in fear. What power! And honestly, even though you still deliever variety of laughs and potential riffing, one aspect of you keeps me coming back for more: your theme song! Oh, how brilliant is your theme song? I burned it onto a CD, for crying out loud! Does that not express my loyalty to you? I have no concept who was crazy enough to write the lyrics and place it to one of the worst tunes to come out of the '80s, but if I ever meet them, I will be sure to shake their hand (or tentacle) and say, "Thank you. Thank you."Can you read what's in my mind? SKULLDUGGERY! SKULLDUGGERY! Tearing up my mind! Massive breath, passion in your eyes SKULLDUGGERY! SKULLDUGGERY! I just found a clue, it's all gone! YEAH! I can see what's in your head SKULLDUGGERY! SKULLDUGGERY! Feeling just ahead (??) Killer's smile, actually I understand SKULLDUGGERY! SKULLDUGGERY! Shattered hopes and dreams all fall down! YEAH!Oh, nice times, nice times. 4/4 stars for sheer crapdom
I don't even know where to begin. The Scooby-like music. The frumpy male lead who, apparently, was Johnny Depp before there was Johnny Depp. The stiff, wooden females. The guy making the puzzle (I mean, what the heck does that prove?) This film makes me wish to puke whenever I see it and for some reason I see it often. You have to wonder why it is that each girl in city is unaccountably attracted to Adam. The edges of this guy's mouth are turned down so far, that even when he smiles it looks like he's frowning. But what can I say? The theme song is very catchy. It sticks to you like painful, prickly brambles. Basically, the entire film is like a terrible high school play, and obviously had the budget of one. All in all, I suggest this film to fanatics of truly horrible cinema. Like me.
This was probably the worst film I've ever seen. Imagery? Symbolism? My ass. This film was pure crap. Its plot holes had plot holes. The intense amount of useless hero who die evoke no emotion. The entire constant costume changes was impossible, as well as retarded. Ugh...I can't even hold writing this, since thinking about the film makes me wish to vomit all over my keyboard.I would never force this film upon even my most hated enemy. I cannot conceive how this boy wrote this movie, and thought that it was nice enough to be directed and produced. I cannot conceive how any self-respecting actor would read the script and now take on one of the roles. I cannot even conceive HOW I MANAGED TO SIT THROUGH THE WHOLE DAMN THING. It was like a train-wreck in slow motion, so terrible that one can't look away, even with the vile hatred of Ota Strichter or whatever his name is building up within one's self. Seriously folks: This review has horrible grammar and structure because the sucktitude (a word I just made up because there is no word in the English language to describe such drivel) has me in a finished fluster.Do yourself a favour, instead of watching this movie, do something a lot more entertaining than watching this horrendous piece of junk movie, such as gnawing of every of your digits one by one, or, say, slamming your head as difficult as you can into a the frame of a vehicle door and then subsequently closing the door on your head as difficult as you can over and over.If you'll excuse me though, I have to go shove a burning ember into my nose in the hopes that it will reach my brain and burn the memories of it from my mind.
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