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Born Into Mafia 2 2016
Description: Jack is a divorced, ex CIA agent, living in his disabled father's home (Jeff the Drunk from the Howard Stern Show), His daughter Sharon, wants to become an actress and needs her father's signature permission to fly to Hollywood for Black Casting Couch Auditions, where she eventually gets kidnapped by ISIS. They Kidnapped the Wrong Daughter, as her father Jack, possesses a particular set of skills.
Released: 19 Feb 2016 Director: George Anton Writers: George Anton, Milos Momcilovic, Derris Nile, Elias Zeitounian Actors: Claudia Blum, Milton Crane, Jeff the Drunk, Joel Harkham Genres: Action, Adventure, Comedy
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Born Into Mafia 2 Reviews:

Absolutely awful. This film rips off scenes and plot from different films (mostly "Taken"), but ends up being a jumbled nonsensical mess. It just seems like an hour long trailer. I've categorized the various methods this film killed itself.RIP-OFF: From the very beginning a shot which is obviously copied from the wood-chopping intro to "Commando", you can sense that you're in for an hour of [email protected] TIMELINE: The editor doesn't seem to know what chronological order means.The timeline of this film jumps back and forth more than your brain can hold track of. At first they test to allow you know where in the timeline you are by captions like "2 weeks from now", and "2 days before kidnapping".... but after a while they seem to give up. You'll be shown shots of women being kidnapped, then the same women auditioning for a calendar, then trying to escape, then being "introduced", then being operated on, then taking images at photoshoot...and it goes on leaving you with a feeling of "wtf is happening?"NARRATION: Narration by two various guys, very random and don't match the scene, and they same the same things over and over again, like "I'd do anything for my daughter", "he'd do anything for his daughter", "born into mafia". After a while the random phrases just turn into random words, and seem to talk about happenings that happened 30 minutes earlier in the movie, but as if they just occurred ("she was excited to se the keys, but didn't realize how much she harm her father".STEREOTYPES: OK so each middle-easterner wears literally towels on their heads which are timber clamped to the back of their heads (i sh1t you not), sells bodyparts, slaves and is a threat to national security.FACTUAL ERRORS: So despite the writer/director being Russian, he assumes that KGB and Russian mob, and CIA are all the same thing, and the lead hero is or was in all of them.....there's more to come, but I've only seen 40 minutes of the movie.


It's about an hour long and reminded me of the first "Taken" movie though the "kidnapping" doesn't really happen until around the ending and then the ending is just her father stating they're (paraphrase) "messing with the wrong guy" and that he's coming after them.This movie moves slowly for an hour long film. The father chops wood for a living, or something (one of the times my mind began to wander) and he's divorced from his wife who's remarried and he may or may not be permitted to see his daughter (though there are scenes where they see every other) and something about Iranians making a movie but really they're terrorists. I don't know...my mind kept wandering.Some of the acting wasn't that bad. I've now seen worse. The video quality is about the same as the video quality on a cell phone. They do test multiple locations, which is a nice thing but the direction and writing was sub par and there's absolutely no originality to the story.The melody is sometimes off putting in how they test the composition for certain scenes. They also used horror category results (like in the beginning when the main character's chopping wood) that seemed out of zone what ultimately seemed like a Thriller (not so much that genre, either).They have it subtitled (I have no concept why, seemed all in English to me) but some of the subtitles have misspellings and mistypes. Overall: not the worst movie I've seen but they shouldn't have left a TV-style cliffhanger.



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